Voices of WRJ: Vayeishev

by Louise Johanson “This is the family history of Jacob.” Parashat Vayeishev is a continuation of Abraham’s descendants, as the Israelites prepare to move to Egypt. We read in this parashah that Jacob (Israel) made a coat of many colors that he gave to his favorite son, Joseph, the second youngest of his sons. Joseph’s brothers hated him for being their father’s favorite, a position which became more hardened when he related a dream he had in which he told his brothers that he would rule over them. In another dream, which Joseph details to his father and brothers, he tells them that the sun, moon, and 11 stars were bowing down to him. Although Jacob finds this dream hard to believe, he does little to improve the situation between Joseph and his brothers, who hate him for what he has said. In fact, his brothers are so enraged that they conspire to kill him. Of course we know that this does not happen because Reuben, the oldest son, intervenes. We see in this early portion of the parashah that Jacob not only does not deal fairly with his sons, but is not a good role model for any of them. I believe this last part has a lesson for all of us, whether we are leaders of our sisterhoods or congregations, on our WRJ District boards, and/or within WRJ. Having been in each of these positions, at separate times or all at the same time, I have found that it is important to deal with each person on their own merits and strengths and to let each person know that they have attributes which make them the right person for a particular job. Despite all of our best efforts, we sometimes find that a person who takes on a role of responsibility does not fulfill the goals they may set out for themselves or fulfill the expectations as written in a job description. When this happens, we, as leaders, need to accept the reality and discuss the consequences of that person’s inability to perform adequately. We also know there are times when there are problems within our local sisterhoods between individuals which need to be resolved in order for the organization to operate effectively. All of this sounds easy on the surface, but these are emotionally charged instances, where being calm and neutral is the key. Having the ability to do this is not something we come by naturally, but learn through experience or through classes. We want to resolve any clashes between individuals or people taking on roles which they do not fulfill because these people have been asked to take on particular roles for which we believe they have the ability. Although it cannot always be helped, sometimes our best efforts result in these individuals walking away, at least temporarily. Our goal, of course, is to keep these people involved in our organizations because we know that we are always stronger together. Having been trained as a mediator, and used that training recently at two WRJ District events to conduct workshops on listening skills, I am aware of the implications of the words we use with and to others. Perhaps this story of Joseph could have had a different ending had Joseph learned to use language that was less inflammatory to his brothers and father. Louise Johanson is an WRJ Mid-Atlantic District Area Director and WRJ Board of Directors member. She is also Temple Solel Sisterhood Vice President in Bowie, MD.